Doug's guilt over Philippa's death haunts him when Tristan pays a visit
Elaine regrets a past she can't atone for, but has hope for a future
Tristan and Ian prepare for the iCafe's opening with some scheming on the menu
Daphne gets more than she bargained for at her job interview
Becca toys with Jason and Julie but Jason surprises her with some hardball
...and Beth faces some of her darkest fears -- and memories.
This long episode (16K words) is split into two parts, so you can take a break if you like! Alas, our cast isn't as fortunate, forced to withstand some probing questions they'd rather not deal with. Here's a teaser:
Spoiler
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have to think so hard about this," Beth says eventually.
"There's no should or shouldn't. Answer whenever you choose. Can you tell me why it's a difficult question for you to answer?"
She shrugs and looks away.*"Because I'm embarrassed."
Shame is a noose for her, Kalid knows. It clutches at her like a physical rope, making her breathe faster and constricting her words. "There's nothing to be embarrassed by. I do think it's important for you to discuss this aspect of your life. Especially considering your condition."
"As I said, I'm not a very... sexual person." She lifts her shoulder again, a hand creeping up to her mouth, covering it. She does this a lot while she talks. He has written down in shorthand this tendency, wanting to find a pattern.
"Why do you say that?"
"It's not... it's not that I don't have sexual relationships. I don't have any kind of relationships, not really. I've only had three real boyfriends in my life. Stupid, right?"
"No. I don’t find it stupid at all."
"But it's just so abnormal. I'm almost thirty-one now. That averages one person a decade. Or, I guess, starting with my teens, about one point five."
He smiles gently at her math, and she smiles back. Briefly, but it's a smile. "Everyone is different,” he assures her. “What matters is what you want. Do you want to have more relationships? If you don't, then you're under no obligation to have them. If you do, then it's something we can discuss."
She swallows. "I guess I do. I mean... yes. I do."
"Why? What did you like about being with someone, romantically? It isn’t the physical aspect, I presume, if as you say, you don’t enjoy sex."
“That isn’t really… I didn’t mean that I don’t like it, exactly. I just don’t find it very fulfilling. At least not yet. Maybe I just haven’t been lucky.”
Kalid isn’t surprised that she’s backing away from her earlier admission. She does this often. “Have you had any particularly bad experiences?”
She seems to draw herself inwards, her body sinking deeper into the sofa. “A couple.”
ASF's URL is http://www.skyfalls.com. As always, there's a printable version of the episode available on the site, and both a detailed previous episode recap and a quick summary that will remind you of stuff you need to know for this episode. And of course, we have easily accessed character bios so you can learn more about everyone you come across.
Please let me know your thoughts either here, on our mailing list. And don't forget to follow ASF on Twitter: @aboutSkyfalls.
I enjoyed the long episode SO much . And not just because it was long, that wast just an extra bonus added.
I loved that you touched on some long forgotten "relationships" - like Doug/Tristan, Tristan/Ian. I enjoyed the iCafe scenes, it was good to see the two guys in business (even if the web-lingo confused me sometimes as well ). This is a place for the future, for the new aggresive future, while Boondoggles was for the past.
I continue to enjoy the Ian/Daphne interaction. I feel that as Ian saved Daphne, she as well will save him from his stepmother's attraction. And perhaps teach him a new kind of responsibility, towards people. I know he has that already when doing business, but she will make him become more mature in his relationships. She has real problems she needs to deal with and she will make him realize that not everybody's life is easy as his own.
Jason and Julie seem a little geek, too good to be true. Don't get me wrong, I like them that way, I just wonder whether there are any teenagers left like that - concerned about correctness, about telling the truth etc.
I feel pity for Doug. I really don't know how you ever plan to get him out of the mess he is in. It was the storyline which attracted me the least of the entire episode. I know I'm evil, but I don't really care what happens to Doug and Elaine. They are kind of boring. I feel that they both deserve what they have right now. I cannot really empathize with them, even if they both are trying to make ammends.
And last but not least, what a treat I had with the Beth scenes . I loved that with one minor exception you narrated them from the Kalid POV (see, I'm getting better at noticing such things, after reading what other more experienced readers have commented on similar occasions). We know the solution to the mystery but that doesn't mean that seeing the way Kalid solves it is less interesting. In fact, I think it is more interesting this way. I remember reading detective stories when I was young, and when the revelation as to who the murderer is finally came, I felt frustrated - becuase I never guessed on my own. So for such complex puzzles it is better for me at least, to know the solution beforehand and just enjoy the journey.
Is it good seeing Beth opening herself up, little by little. At least she accepts she's pregnant. I don't remember her former gentle boyfriend being mentioned, was he?
Anyway after the kidnapping story, and the Martina rape scene & follow-up, this episode was a nice change of pace and of focus.
__________________
Life has more imagination than we carry in our dreams.
Dana hon! How have you been? So glad to hear from you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
I loved that you touched on some long forgotten "relationships" - like Doug/Tristan, Tristan/Ian. I enjoyed the iCafe scenes, it was good to see the two guys in business (even if the web-lingo confused me sometimes as well ). This is a place for the future, for the new aggresive future, while Boondoggles was for the past.
Right on the money -- aggressiveness is exactly what Tristan's aiming for, and I'm happy that came across not just in his behavior but even in the theme of the soon-to-be-launched venture. The Doug/Tristan relationship is definitely one I'd like to develop more. Both men need friends quite badly, so why not exploit their messed-up history and see whether a friendship can result?
Of course, Tristan and Doug are also connected via their relationships with Beth and Elaine, which is precisely what Tristan is counting on. He's getting sneakier, isn't he? Cam is apparently influencing him.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
I continue to enjoy the Ian/Daphne interaction. I feel that as Ian saved Daphne, she as well will save him from his stepmother's attraction. And perhaps teach him a new kind of responsibility, towards people. I know he has that already when doing business, but she will make him become more mature in his relationships. She has real problems she needs to deal with and she will make him realize that not everybody's life is easy as his own.
I'm very happy that you like these two together, and am totally digging your insights re: Ian needing a bit of a savior himself; his relationship with Danielle is toxic in all kinds of ways and frankly so are most of his family influences. He's also insular, as you so rightly point out -- he needs perspective that someone like Daphne might be able to bring him. If he lets her, that is. Ian isn't exactly keen on starting up a romance with her, for some reason, although he's certainly sending her mixed messages about that.
(I'm not sure how well this came across, but I tried to show that Ian was not planning on hiring Daphne until Tristan nudged him into it. He's definitely ambivalent about how far to push things.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
Jason and Julie seem a little geek, too good to be true. Don't get me wrong, I like them that way, I just wonder whether there are any teenagers left like that - concerned about correctness, about telling the truth etc.
Oh gosh, I hope there are! I was like that, and I think/hope my niece is like that. (As I write this, I'm just realizing that my niece is now only two years younger than Jason/Julie/Becca. She was born the same year I started writing ASF! Very trippy.) I know the troublemakers are more prevalent, certainly in the media, because they're where most of the conflicts come from. But there must be some of the nice kids left too!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
I feel pity for Doug. I really don't know how you ever plan to get him out of the mess he is in. It was the storyline which attracted me the least of the entire episode. I know I'm evil, but I don't really care what happens to Doug and Elaine. They are kind of boring. I feel that they both deserve what they have right now. I cannot really empathize with them, even if they both are trying to make ammends.
Aw! Well, I'll take pity, if not empathy. I don't think it makes you evil. There are roughly 2,487 characters in ASF, and you can't possibly care about all of them. Also, as you mention, both Doug and Elaine made their own mistakes and, while there are some extenuating circumstances due to utterly screwed-up spouses (Nora and Jack, respectively), Doug/Elaine themselves caused a lot of damage on their own, especially on their kids' lives. That can be very tough to forgive or condone.
I wouldn't be surprised if more people feel pity toward Doug than Elaine these days. Doug/Elaine have very different character trajectories: Doug started out as a complete jerk and has grown over the course of the series; Elaine was introduced as a loving, friendly, kind woman, but with Beth's analysis we're certainly learning more and more icky things about her past. And speaking of Beth...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
And last but not least, what a treat I had with the Beth scenes . I loved that with one minor exception you narrated them from the Kalid POV (see, I'm getting better at noticing such things, after reading what other more experienced readers have commented on similar occasions). We know the solution to the mystery but that doesn't mean that seeing the way Kalid solves it is less interesting. In fact, I think it is more interesting this way. I remember reading detective stories when I was young, and when the revelation as to who the murderer is finally came, I felt frustrated - becuase I never guessed on my own. So for such complex puzzles it is better for me at least, to know the solution beforehand and just enjoy the journey.
Very interesting to hear, Dana. Yes, POV is vital here, and I specifically went with Kalid's POV as a result of audience feedback -- people wanted to learn more about him, and hear his perspective on the Beth situation.
This is a tricky balancing act for exactly the reason you mention: what do you do when the audience knows more than the characters? Might be boring. And not just that: a writer could undermine a character's credibility when someone who's supposed to be an expert (whether it's a psychiatrist like Kalid, a detective like Mike or attorney like Ross) can't solve a puzzle to which the audience knows the answer.
For me, the answer is to ensure that the expert's confusion or lack of understanding is believable and natural. We all know when Beth is lying, or when she's displaying signs of having switched over to Molly. But Kalid doesn't know Beth well yet, and while he suspects she's hiding things, he's definitely not gonna jump to the conclusion "oh, she's obviously got multiple personalities." Beth's transitions are subtle; she doesn't suddenly spasm and turn into a heinous bitch who's 180 degrees from her normal personality. Plus, DID is extremely rare, soaps and webseries to the contrary.
Hopefully this will work. And also, as a way to keep things interesting for you guys, there are plenty of unknown aspects to Beth beyond her alters. The more we learn about her past, the more tangled the mess will be. The solution to Beth's issues isn't as straightforward as some may think.
BTW, I totally feel the same way you do about mysteries: I don't like when solutions seem pulled from out of nowhere. Admittedly my favorite author, Rex Stout, was notorious for withholding some vital evidence from the reader, but his writing is so damnably enjoyable that I can forgive some sleight-of-hand. Some shocks are a hoot, sure, but usually I want to feel like I had a chance to solve the puzzle.
So you guys will always have the clues laid out for you in the open. Obviously there will be some surprises and twists along the way, but for me it's just much more fun and challenging to mystify an audience while playing strictly fair!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
Is it good seeing Beth opening herself up, little by little. At least she accepts she's pregnant. I don't remember her former gentle boyfriend being mentioned, was he?
Nope, you're right! The Albany boyfriend was brought up in Beth's first session w/Kalid, but this is a different guy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dana
Anyway after the kidnapping story, and the Martina rape scene & follow-up, this episode was a nice change of pace and of focus.
Thanks a million, Dana! Yes, it's been nice to switch things up a bit and put the spotlight on some less angsty stuff. (Not that Beth counts as "less angsty," of course.)
Sorry for the lengthy rambling answer, but you've brought up so many interesting issues and I love talking about this stuff! Again, many many thanks for your feedback and your continued support of ASF.
Of course, Tristan and Doug are also connected via their relationships with Beth and Elaine, which is precisely what Tristan is counting on. He's getting sneakier, isn't he? Cam is apparently influencing him.
Yes, I saw that . I don't think Tristan would ever visit Doug if it weren't for Elaine. It was kind of "out of the blue".
Quote:
Ian isn't exactly keen on starting up a romance with her, for some reason, although he's certainly sending her mixed messages about that.
(I'm not sure how well this came across, but I tried to show that Ian was not planning on hiring Daphne until Tristan nudged him into it. He's definitely ambivalent about how far to push things.)
For some reason? I think he's still attracted to Danielle more than he wants. And I think that Ian is basically a good guy, so he wouldn't want (most of his consciuous time, anyway) to drag her into a relationship which would be anything but simple - due to his family mostly. But all the while he likes her, even if for the moment less than she likes him. For the time being, he's bound to change attitude anytime. For example, I don't think he planned the dinner invitation beforehand. I think it's something that just came up in his mind and it occured to him that Daphne might serve him as a shield to show Danielle that he's off her.
I'm getting confusing here, but since Ian doesn't know his mind yet, how are we supposed to know it? By the way, a scene written from his POV would help - unless you want to keep him and his reasons a mystery for the time being .
I like Ian, I guess the 'troubled / vulnerable / sensitive but not showing' type always attracts girls. He's the one I would have fallen for if I were an ASF character. He's too young for me, though .
And his intention not to hire Daphne before Tristan mentioned it came across, as well as his disappoinment that perhaps she only came because her father suggested it to her .
Quote:
This is a tricky balancing act for exactly the reason you mention: what do you do when the audience knows more than the characters? Might be boring. And not just that: a writer could undermine a character's credibility when someone who's supposed to be an expert (whether it's a psychiatrist like Kalid, a detective like Mike or attorney like Ross) can't solve a puzzle to which the audience knows the answer.
On the other hand, it would not be believable if it was too easy for the detective to solve the mystery. I think you're doing a good job .
Quote:
Beth's transitions are subtle; she doesn't suddenly spasm and turn into a heinous bitch who's 180 degrees from her normal personality.
Hopefully this will work. And also, as a way to keep things interesting for you guys, there are plenty of unknown aspects to Beth beyond her alters. The more we learn about her past, the more tangled the mess will be. The solution to Beth's issues isn't as straightforward as some may think.
For example like when she said "unseemly", that was Molly. While the "I hate her" was Bitsy. I'm glad that Beth still has many sides of herself to show to us.
Well, I'll leave you to your writing, otherwise you won't finish the next episode .
Thanks a lot, Kira.
__________________
Life has more imagination than we carry in our dreams.
Yes, I saw that . I don't think Tristan would ever visit Doug if it weren't for Elaine. It was kind of "out of the blue".
Cool! Though I must admit, in fairness to Tris, that he's been shown visiting Doug before he even knew of the Beth/Elaine relationship -- though there's noooo way you or anyone else in the audience would be expected to remember this, since it dates back to 2003, right before the hiatus from hell. Let's see if I can find the recap.... ah yes, here it is, the recap of #4:16, Crossed Lines, Part II. But you're definitely right about his primary motives now. It's about 75% Beth snoopery, and 25% caring about Doug.
Quote:
For some reason? I think he's still attracted to Danielle more than he wants. And I think that Ian is basically a good guy, so he wouldn't want (most of his consciuous time, anyway) to drag her into a relationship which would be anything but simple - due to his family mostly. But all the while he likes her, even if for the moment less than she likes him. For the time being, he's bound to change attitude anytime. For example, I don't think he planned the dinner invitation beforehand. I think it's something that just came up in his mind and it occured to him that Daphne might serve him as a shield to show Danielle that he's off her.
I'm getting confusing here, but since Ian doesn't know his mind yet, how are we supposed to know it? By the way, a scene written from his POV would help - unless you want to keep him and his reasons a mystery for the time being .
Very interesting reading, and you're right in many ways; that's all I'll say without being too spoilery. Also, yes, Ian's perspective will be shown quite soon.
Quote:
I like Ian, I guess the 'troubled / vulnerable / sensitive but not showing' type always attracts girls. He's the one I would have fallen for if I were an ASF character. He's too young for me, though .
HA! I hear you. Sometimes I feel quite ancient when writing for some of these younger characters. Ian's easier to write than some of the other youngies because he's very sophisticated/mature for his age (God bless European boarding schools! ). Like you, I go for the cool-on-the-outside, tortured-on-the-inside types. Especially when they're witty. I just melt.
Quote:
And his intention not to hire Daphne before Tristan mentioned it came across, as well as his disappoinment that perhaps she only came because her father suggested it to her .
And
Quote:
On the other hand, it would not be believable if it was too easy for the detective to solve the mystery. I think you're doing a good job .
Yay! Good to hear. Thank you!
Quote:
For example like when she said "unseemly", that was Molly. While the "I hate her" was Bitsy.
Ah! I'm going to surprise you then. You're right about the 'unseemly', but the "I hate you" was all Beth. If it had been Bitsy, she wouldn't have been feeling guilty for it -- as seen by her pinching her lip -- and for that matter, Beth wouldn't even know she (Bitsy) had said it. When her alters take over, Beth is usually unaware of what happens: that time is a blank to her. The only alter whose activity Beth can (vaguely) remember is Amanda, who's thoughtful enough to share some memories with Beth. (On the other hand, Molly's almost always the only one to actually intrudes on Beth's everyday thought processes. Which is why Beth knows about her and not the others.)
For giggles, here's the point in the scene where Beth transitions to Molly. It's the first time Kalid notes that her vocal tone changes:
Spoiler
Kalid has been scribbling all this down, but now he stops to focus on Beth. “So you think that's why your mother resented you."
"Not resented. Hated." Her voice is flat. He’s heard this tone from her before… the words sound physically painful to get out, yet they’re paradoxically more forthright. "I don't think you understand how horrible she was to me."
"I’m afraid I don’t. Please tell me."
"Oh, she varied. She could ignore me for a week and then suddenly remember I existed and wouldn't stop making me feel guilty for existing. Always making little comments about me. Saying I was spoiled. Spoiled!" She laughs harshly. "I guess I was, but not the way she meant. No. Spoiled like month-old milk."
Rest of the scene is all Molly.
Now there's really no reason you should be aware of this... it's not intended to be telegraphed in big blinking letters. I set up these rules because I pretty much needed to keep careful track of who Beth is for my own sanity (if not hers, heh!). Also I feel that even if the readers don't ever know precisely when Beth is Molly, or whoever, you'll hopefully have the unconscious sense that this stuff isn't haphazard.
Thanks for your insightful comments, Dana. They're very, very inspiring.
Hi, Kira! I've only made my way through Part I, and it doesn't look like I'll get to Part II until late tonight, but I wanted to let you know how effective Beth's therapy scenes were. Especially the second one -- playing it through Kalid's eyes was an interesting move that worked very well, because we got to see the transitions and how Beth backs out of everything she says, rather than being in the confusion of her head. We don't often get to observe how someone else, other than Clark and sometimes Tristan, sees her and her behavior. And her honest answers about human relationships and what she would like out of them were heartbreaking and all-too-relatable. She's really a wonderful, complex character.
Hiya Michael! I'm thrilled that you enjoyed those scenes. As you mention, Beth is so rarely seen by other characters -- her circle is very tightly drawn -- the therapy offers a chance to get some perspective on what she seems like to outsiders. I was originally hesitant to delve into her therapy sessions (and of course we won't be seeing all of them) but a few now and then are okay.
Thanks for reading, even if you didn't get to the whole thing. I appreciate your taking the time to read and respond!
I just saved the printable version to my desktop so I can read it when I'm out at my parents' forever-broken-wireless place, so I'll be reading it later today! Looking forward to it.
I know I've said it before, but I have to reiterate that I really love the writing for Jason. He's such a fully realized character, with all his insecurities and over-thinking and quiet little victories. He's such a treat to read. I actually also enjoyed Becca in this, whereas I usually find her a little bit "cartoon bitch." There was something on display here, a little bit more shading in her actions and reactions, that was very effective. The Julie/Jason/Becca triad is becoming more and more engaging to me, just because of the three very distinct personalities at play and the sparks that fly when any or all of them interact.
I know I already commented on Beth's therapy scenes, but I enjoyed how you contrasted her version of events with Elaine's own recounting to Doug. I don't think Elaine's scene would have held much weight in isolation, but it was very effective in terms of seeing how much she has changed since her kids were young and in coloring Beth's telling of her childhood. (BTW, is Jack around? I swear he showed up in Elaine's hospital room a while ago. Did that really happen?) There was also some nice stuff with regards to Doug's own realizations about the kind of person he's been and wants to be, played against Elaine's acknowledgment of her growth and what a shitty parent she was. Doug and Elaine don't feel like 'leads' to me, but these scenes worked because of their relation to what was going on with Daphne and Beth in this episode.
Some gripes: while pretty much everything about the writing for Daphne feels very authentic and true to the character, I'm so over this whole Ian/Daphne/Tyler thing. To be fair, a big part of that is probably more because the episodes have been posted over a long period of time than because of the story itself, but it feels like we're seeing scene after scene of "You like me." "No, I don't." "But you have to hang out with me." "Why?" "Because of my family." "Oh, yeah." Etc, etc, etc. Not that any of it is poorly written, but it just feels played at this point. I'm ready for some movement on that front! And a rare criticism of the writing in ASF: as much as I'm happy to see Tristan at work, and I like what you're developing with the iCafe/Sorcery, I found that scene with him, Ian, and the assistant to be a bit heavy-handed. It felt like the kind of TV scene where people are stating things they already know just to relay it to the audience. You worked it as skillfully as you could, dialogue-wise, by setting it around the preemptive review being read, but I think you could've just gotten that information (about how the place works) out in a tight action paragraph, inside Tristan's head or something, and moved on. It felt like an entire scene of people telling us how things are just so we know.
Anyway! Sorry to bitch. I can't believe I'm suddenly so engaged with the teens. And I loved Daphne's mental horror at the idea of not graduating, while she knows that this is probably going to be her fate. Nice stuff there.
Hi Michael, thanks very much for the comments. I'm extremely gratified that you're liking Jason so much, and that Becca seems more real to you. She hasn't really been seen all that much, certainly not her own POV, so I'm not surprised you've found her flat. She's not really her own person yet, exactly; she's imitating her mother (which is scary in itself), she's imitating pop culture idols (both real and fictional), and basically trying on the persona of the supremely confident social leader. Her connections to Jason and Julie will help shade her mainly because in different ways they don't react the way she expects them to. Maybe she and Spencer should hook up at some point! At least while they're both on the East Coast. I know she's a little younger than he is, but she likes older guys and is quite mature for her age!
You're certainly on the mark re: Doug and Elaine. They're not 'leads' really, though Doug is moving up in my estimation 'cause I just love to write for him. Elaine and Beth's memories of the past are both suspect: Elaine 'cause of her drugs and Beth 'cause... she's Beth. So unwrapping the whole picture is certainly ahead of us. To answer your question, yes, we've seen Jack through the fog of Elaine's medicated dreams. Damn good memory! Elaine wasn't certain if he was real or just a hallucination from her painkillers.
Sorry about the clunky Tristan/Ian/Susan scene, and the dull Daphne/Ian stuff. Part of it was spacefilling (as if I need it!) and old leftover material from a while back, and yeah, you're absolutely right about the Sorcery explanation being heavy-handed! I knew it was clunky (especially Ian's dialogue) but just couldn't stomach editing this episode anymore! I'll probably go back and tweak it now that I've got some distance from it, maybe even tonight.
(I don't think I'd want to fob it off purely in a thought process, though, because I liked the bad review gimmick -- it's mostly there to contrast Tristan's experienced, been-there-done-that attitude toward criticism and Ian's more hot-headed, insecure reaction, which was exacerbated by Daphne's presence. For once Tristan got to be the confident guy -- a role he hasn't played since the series began.)
And the Daphne/Ian beat was yet another example of the problems due to poor pacing, and not trusting that the readers will remember anything that happened. It's silly and I really need to get past that. Things will be moving on the D/I/T front so I won't have to keep backtracking like this and probably boring the heck out of y'all who are still reading. So basically there's no need to apologize for bitching; I earned it and I'm grateful for your helpful and honest critique, the good and bad.
Thanks (and congrats!) for making it through the episode. Maybe I should give out prizes for marathon-winners.
.
. And not just because it was long, that wast just an extra bonus added.
). This is a place for the future, for the new aggresive future, while Boondoggles was for the past. 
.
